The only reason i enjoy going to bed is so i can make stories up in my head which makes my brain think it’s actually real
Normal reaction:
My reaction:
Naps are tricky because you either wake up refreshed and relaxed or you have a headache, dry throat, and are unaware of what year you’re in.
Expectation
Reality
It’s so sad but so true
insomnia is my favorite.
Someone’s probably in love with you right now, even though you think you’re boring and stupid and smell bad most of the time, someone probably saw you last week and wiped their sweaty hands on the insides of their pockets and thought about your body under your clothing and about how you would look asleep in their bed
I think that’s really doubtful because I don’t believe in leaving the house.
Husband animates joke about tortilla chips told by his drunk wife.
Pretty much the best thing I’ve ever seen in my life.
This is the cutest fucking thing I have ever seen in my whole ever.
I snorted.